Information Overload

You know the drill...

1. First thing you wash in the shower?
Any spiders that are unlucky enough to be hiding in the tub. Of course, if they're especially frisky — or large — I summon the cat to eat them.

2. What color is your favorite hoodie?
Are those the little ice cream cups with chocolate on one side, vanilla on the other and a little wooden spoon to shovel both sides into my mouth? I love those things!

3. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?
A gentleman would never kiss and tell.

4. Do you plan outfits?
I've outsourced that to Garanimals.

5. How are you feeling RIGHT now?
Full, and somewhat concerned about this afternoon's deadlines.

6. What’s the closest thing to you that's red?
A box of cranberry tea, which is near the top of the "wall of tea" I've built to separate myself from my co-workers.

7. Tell me about the last dream you remember having:
I dreamed that my dad was keeping a moose and a camel in his dentist's office. When I asked him why, he replied that it was always a good idea to keep animals together that were unlikely to breed with each other.

I also asked him why he was keeping a chimpanzee in the office and he corrected me, pointing out that what he had was a baby gorilla. He'd had to let the chimpanzee go, he said, because he was mean, and was causing problems with the other staff.

8. Did you meet anybody new today?
I met Priscilla, a wonderful member of our production department. I was pleased to hear that we still have a production department.

9. What are you craving right now?
More time to write. A plate of pea greens with a little butter and salt would also be nice.

10. Do you floss daily?
No. But I smuggled a toothbrush and toothpaste into the concert I attended last night. Dental hygiene is important!

11. What comes to mind when I say cabbage?
"Cabbages, cabbages, yum yum yum. Cabbages, cabbages, gimme some."

12. Are you emotional?
I'm not allowed to read books or watch movies in which something bad happens to a dog. I also get choked up while watching anything to do with the 2004 World Series, World War II or Superman.

13. Have you ever counted to 1,000?
I usually don't make it past the 99th bottle of beer on the wall.

14. Do you bite into your ice cream or just lick it?
Food is meant to be bitten. That's why I keep my teeth in such good shape.

15. Do you like your hair?
I did.

16. Do you like yourself?
I wouldn't kick myself out of bed, unless I flailed a lot or made little whimpering noises while I slept. But I don't think that I do.

17. Would you go out to eat with George W. Bush?
If he was picking up the tab.

18. What are you listening to right now?
The sweet sounds of other people working.

19. Are your parents strict?
They were reasonably strict with me, less so with my brother and shamelessly indulgent with our dog.

20. Would you go sky diving?
Not intentionally.

21. Do you like cottage cheese?
I like it more than, say, cancer, and slightly less than a bad case of heartburn.

22. Have you ever met a celebrity?
I'm having lunch with Isabel Allende tomorrow!

23. Do you rent movies often?
I think of Netflix more as a long-term lease.

24. Is there anything sparkly in the room you're in?
The invisible fairies that make my cell phone work.

25. How many countries have you visited?
About 30. Most of them still exist.

26. Have you made a prank phone call?
Does it count as a prank call if nobody, including you, finds it funny?

27. Have you ever been on a train?
Many times, beginning with good ol' Edaville.

28. Brown or white eggs?
To quote Sarah, "Brown eggs are local eggs, and local eggs are fresh!"

29. Do you have a cell-phone?
Of course! How else would I get all of that healthy radiation into my brain on a daily basis?

30. Do you use Chap Stick?
Not since I left the land of ice and snow behind.

31. Do you own a gun?
I actually do have an official Red Ryder carbine-action air rifle, although it does not have a compass in the stock.

32. Can you use chop sticks?
I think so, though Nam is constantly giving me suggestions for improvement.

33. Who are you going to be with tonight?
Nam and the folks from the Emerson alumni group who are meeting up in the city.

34. Are you too forgiving?
With my cat? Probably. But he's just so damn cute.

35. Ever been in love?
Yes.

36. What is your best friend doing tomorrow?
Based on his status updates, drinking beer and looking for his cat.

37. Ever have cream puffs?
I had a hamster named Creampuff, who bit everyone he met. I can't say I blame him.

38. Last time you cried?
When I opened my most recent Visa bill.

39. What was the last question you asked?
I asked our publisher what he was planning to do with all of the empty space in our building.

40. Favorite time of the year?
Opening Day.

41. Do you have any tattoos?
Only the aliens who abducted me know for sure.

42. Are you sarcastic?
I am completely serious about everything that I say.

43. Have you ever seen The Butterfly Effect?
Let's just say that before I started screwing around with time travel, capybaras were native to Greenland and every other woman in the U.S. was a redhead.

44. Ever walked into a wall?
What I don't understand is how that blasted road runner was able to run through the tunnel I painted on the wall — or where that train was before it roared out of the tunnel and flattened me.

45. Favorite color?
Violet.

46. Have you ever slapped someone?
I am telekinetically slapping people all the time.

47. Is your hair curly?
Depends on the humidity.

48. What was the last CD you bought?
Roy Orbison's Greatest Hits. And before you ask: yes, I am the target demographic for all of public television.

49. Do looks matter?
If they didn't, I wouldn't spend so much time trying to ward off the Evil Eye.

50. Could you ever forgive a cheater?
I don't know. I'd like to believe that I could, but I tend to hold grudges for a long, long time.

51. Is your phone bill sky high?
It certainly seems that way to me. I wish people would stop texting me.

52. Do you like your life right now?
I like it a lot better than I did when I was in high school.

53. Do you sleep with the TV on?
As the TV is located in the living room, there doesn't seem much point in doing so.

54. Can you handle the truth?
Hard to say. I generally have a difficult time distinguishing between truth and a plausible fiction.

55. Do you have good vision?
Except for the fact that I can't see through walls or melt steel with my eyes, yes.

56. Do you hate or dislike more than 3 people?
I tend to forget that people or groups I dislike exist. It's always a jolt, for example, to discover that the band Creed wasn't merely a figment of my disturbed imagination.

57. How often do you talk on the phone?
I prefer talking on the phone to e-mailing or instant messaging. Texting is for emergencies only, such as when I am intoxicated.

58. The last person you held hands with?
My fiancee.

59. What are you wearing right now?
A tie that one of my students gave me for graduation. It's quite nice.

60. What is your favorite animal?
I like ducks. They're equally at home on land, sea or air. And they always look just a bit awkward, though it doesn't seem to bother them.

61. Where was your profile picture taken?
At my desk in my former apartment.

62. Can you hula hoop?
I'm not sure I've ever tried. I think if I was surrounded by a moving hoop I'd start yelling things like "You WILL bow down before me, Jor-El," and that's the sort of thing I've been trying to avoid lately.

63. Do you have a job?
I do, though you'd never know it from the number of things I post on Facebook.

64. What was the most recent thing you bought?
Tickets to tomorrow's event at Book Passage.

65. Have you ever crawled through a window?
I have gone through many windows, but I have never crawled.